How to Improve Your Self esteem
Before you decide to improve your self esteem you should see these signs and symptoms that will give you a good idea of what kind of self esteem you really have. Then watch the video and try the things listed below it.
Facts About Self Esteem
Your self esteem is how you think of yourself and reflects how you feel about yourself. If you generally feel good about yourself, like yourself, and consider yourself as having value as a person, you most likely have a good healthy sense of self esteem. However, if you perceive yourself to be better and smarter than everyone around you most likely have high self esteem (in some cases too high of self esteem can be offensive to everyone who has to deal with you) and last but certainly not least, there is low self esteem. People who have low self esteem may feel as tho nobody likes them, they don't like themselves or hate themselves. Oftentimes, people with low self esteem may find it hard to make decisions or assert themselves, have a tendency to blame themselves for things that are not their fault, and may even feel guilty if they take time out to do something for themselves (1). Scroll down to see signs of low self esteem, signs of a healthy self esteem and awesome ways to improve your self esteem.
Signs & Symptoms of Low Self Esteem
If you have low self esteem you most likely have many of the following characteristics:
Compare yourself to others and feel you don't measure up
Always see the negative side of things
You want everything to be perfect
You mistrust others (even those who show affection towards you)
You tend to blame yourself or others whenever something goes wrong
Have a fear of taking risks
Often feel unloved or unlovable
Dependent
Let others make decisions
Have an internal fear of being ridiculed by others (2) See more below...
Compare yourself to others and feel you don't measure up
Always see the negative side of things
You want everything to be perfect
You mistrust others (even those who show affection towards you)
You tend to blame yourself or others whenever something goes wrong
Have a fear of taking risks
Often feel unloved or unlovable
Dependent
Let others make decisions
Have an internal fear of being ridiculed by others (2) See more below...
Featured Video: 10 Tips for Improving Self Esteem
Causes of Low Self Esteem
People are not born with low self esteem. Generally speaking if you or someone you know has low self esteem it is most likely because of something that has happened or words that were said repeatedly which have impacted so deeply that you internalize everything that happens, start seeing things from a negative point of view, particularly yourself and everything you do by becoming over critical.
Here are a few things that cause low self esteem:
Physical, emotional, or verbal abuse-Can stem from abuse when you were a child, being in an abusive relationship, having abusive friends or abusive family members. Constant criticism, insults, and neglect from parents, care givers, siblings, spouses, significant others, friends slowly erodes at the person it is directed at's thoughts. Then when something bad happens it impacts the person suffering from the abuse and they internalize, start thinking negatively, start believing that they have no worth as a person. These types of thoughts are dangerous and self destructive. This can lead to nothing good.
Setting unrealistic goals which cannot possibly be accomplished.
Stressful life events, such as relocating to an unfamiliar area, divorce, relationship break ups, death of someone you are close too, going into debt, poor performance in school or athletic events, worrying, not being able to accomplish things you set out to do. All these and other stressful events, can trigger low self esteem, depression, and other emotional issues.
Here are a few things that cause low self esteem:
Physical, emotional, or verbal abuse-Can stem from abuse when you were a child, being in an abusive relationship, having abusive friends or abusive family members. Constant criticism, insults, and neglect from parents, care givers, siblings, spouses, significant others, friends slowly erodes at the person it is directed at's thoughts. Then when something bad happens it impacts the person suffering from the abuse and they internalize, start thinking negatively, start believing that they have no worth as a person. These types of thoughts are dangerous and self destructive. This can lead to nothing good.
Setting unrealistic goals which cannot possibly be accomplished.
Stressful life events, such as relocating to an unfamiliar area, divorce, relationship break ups, death of someone you are close too, going into debt, poor performance in school or athletic events, worrying, not being able to accomplish things you set out to do. All these and other stressful events, can trigger low self esteem, depression, and other emotional issues.
Signs & Symptoms of Positive, Healthy Self Esteem
If you have positive self esteem you most likely have many of the following characteristics:
Confidence in yourself, your abilities, and your appearance
Self direction
Self acceptance
You don't blame others every time something goes wrong
Are aware of your personal strengths
You have the ability to accept when you make a mistake and use it as a learning experience
You have the ability to accept when other people make mistakes
Optimistic and always try to make the best of any situation
You find ways to solve problems
You tend to be independent
You have a cooperative attitude
You are comfortable with all of your emotions
Trust others
Know your limitations
Take good care of yourself
You have the ability to say no to people (2)
Confidence in yourself, your abilities, and your appearance
Self direction
Self acceptance
You don't blame others every time something goes wrong
Are aware of your personal strengths
You have the ability to accept when you make a mistake and use it as a learning experience
You have the ability to accept when other people make mistakes
Optimistic and always try to make the best of any situation
You find ways to solve problems
You tend to be independent
You have a cooperative attitude
You are comfortable with all of your emotions
Trust others
Know your limitations
Take good care of yourself
You have the ability to say no to people (2)
Things to Tell Yourself to Improve Your Self Esteem
Research shows that people who use self affirmations tend to become more self confident and have higher self esteem.
Things you need to tell yourself repeatedly throughout the day:
I respect myself and others
I am lovable and likable
I am confident, and it shows
I care about myself
I am creating loving, healthy relationships (this includes all types of relationships)
I am a good friend to myself and others
I accept myself just as I am
I look great
Life is good, and I like being a part of it (2).
Things you need to tell yourself repeatedly throughout the day:
I respect myself and others
I am lovable and likable
I am confident, and it shows
I care about myself
I am creating loving, healthy relationships (this includes all types of relationships)
I am a good friend to myself and others
I accept myself just as I am
I look great
Life is good, and I like being a part of it (2).
More Things you Can Do to Improve Your Self Esteem
Make a list of things that are affecting your self esteem-After you finish your list, go back to the first thing you wrote down and write down something you can do to improve it. Continue this for each item on your list.
Avoid negative self talk
Do something constructive and positive when you start getting negative thoughts or feelings, such as cleaning a room, changing your hair style, volunteering at a local charity, or helping someone in need.
Only hang around with people who do not insult or belittle you
Don't compare yourself to others or your accomplishments with those of others
Set small goals for yourself and long term goals. After you accomplish the small goals you will get a sense of accomplishment which will build your self confidence and your self esteem.
Be assertive but not demanding.
Don't let others boss you around, use you, or abuse you. Stay away from them.
Make a list of the things you do like about yourself
Take care of yourself
Keep yourself and where you live clean
Break free from codependency-Come to the realization that you do not need someone to make yourself feel special and realize that you are special. Everyone is in their own special way.
Express your independence and feel the exhilarating sense of freedom you get from it.
Always try to do the right thing
Go places that are relaxing and enjoyable for you
Take time out to pamper yourself
Read your bible and pray
Avoid negative self talk
Do something constructive and positive when you start getting negative thoughts or feelings, such as cleaning a room, changing your hair style, volunteering at a local charity, or helping someone in need.
Only hang around with people who do not insult or belittle you
Don't compare yourself to others or your accomplishments with those of others
Set small goals for yourself and long term goals. After you accomplish the small goals you will get a sense of accomplishment which will build your self confidence and your self esteem.
Be assertive but not demanding.
Don't let others boss you around, use you, or abuse you. Stay away from them.
Make a list of the things you do like about yourself
Take care of yourself
Keep yourself and where you live clean
Break free from codependency-Come to the realization that you do not need someone to make yourself feel special and realize that you are special. Everyone is in their own special way.
Express your independence and feel the exhilarating sense of freedom you get from it.
Always try to do the right thing
Go places that are relaxing and enjoyable for you
Take time out to pamper yourself
Read your bible and pray
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Email: [email protected]
References:
1. N.a. "Self-esteem | Mind, the mental health charity - help for mental health problems." Mind.org.uk. n.d. Web. 5 Jan. 2018. <https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/self-esteem/#.WlAx3dWnHrc>
2. (2018). Ucdmc.ucdavis.edu. Retrieved 6 January 2018, from https://www.ucdmc.ucdavis.edu/hr/hrdepts/asap/Documents/Self_esteem.pdf
3. Free Online Logo Maker: Design a Custom Logo - Canva. (2016). About Canva. Retrieved 6 March 2018, from https://www.canva.com/create/logos/
1. N.a. "Self-esteem | Mind, the mental health charity - help for mental health problems." Mind.org.uk. n.d. Web. 5 Jan. 2018. <https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/self-esteem/#.WlAx3dWnHrc>
2. (2018). Ucdmc.ucdavis.edu. Retrieved 6 January 2018, from https://www.ucdmc.ucdavis.edu/hr/hrdepts/asap/Documents/Self_esteem.pdf
3. Free Online Logo Maker: Design a Custom Logo - Canva. (2016). About Canva. Retrieved 6 March 2018, from https://www.canva.com/create/logos/